A Mexican Thanksgiving

A Mexican Thanksgiving 2019

I think about what it is that led me to hold on to 600 pesos over the last 11 months. I think of how miserly I am. How hard hearted I might be to keep something that when not in the country of its origin becomes just paper. My wife would clearly have gifted the money to our Mexican based missionaries, I however stuffed it in my headphone pouch and “saved it for later.”

Today I realized it was a plan to take me and possibly for the time being, just me (Matt), back to Mexico. This gift of 600 pesos was to provide for me, God’s son, through the adoption I am living out from his water, blood and divinity- given through the grace of my baptism. I still question “Lord, are you calling my family to stay in Mexico, for surely I have loved like no other this week. I will surely carry this week for many many years, but is this your clear sign? Lord, thank you for replacing the law with your spirit of faith. Your spirit of promise and your Love though Jesus Christ.”

I am so happy I have let you into my life in so many many ways. To shine in the darkest places of my own heart, to change me to want to continually be more like you Jesus, in EVERY way.

Galatians has been speaking to me clearly, to not inherit a spirit of the law, but of FAITH. “For….what was promised to faith in Jesus Christ might be given to those who believe.” Gal 3:22

I always ask the Lord, is this you? I always wish it to be his voice and his will guiding me in my missionary journey, but it is always so easy for me to rely on my humanity or to default to the ways that have guided me through 34 years of my life, previous to this last year. But then I read further and realize God is always speaking the language of my heart, if only I were to listen and listen intently.

“Did you receive the spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish?” Gal 3:2

I think many many days I am so foolish Lord, I am so worn down by sacrifices, of my own doing, that it is hard to receive your mercy that is so freely and foundationally offered.

“Having begun with the spirit, are you now ending with the flesh?” Gal 3:3

But Lord, Lord, it is too tempting for me to always go back to the flesh. The flesh that you made and gifted to me to use. My intelligence, my resourcefulness, all of these myriad of GREAT gifts you have bestowed on me. You Lord are the one who gave them to me and allowed me to sharpen them to such a useful tool…are you not, simply by the gift of these abilities endorsing their use for MY GAIN.

No, no, no….it is so easy for me to fall into this trap almost daily. Lord, allow me to see your gifts as freely given to point back to you, Jesus!

“Did you experience so many things in vain? If it really is in vain?” Gal 3:4

Haiti tough, Haiti sufferage, the sacrifice that Haiti became to my family and myself. Isn’t sacrifice what you wanted of me God? I have sacrificed everything I accumulated, my house, my business, my comfort. I have laid it all down for you Jesus, for this life of service, for this lived in life of discipleship to you Jesus. No, no, no! None of what I have experienced has been in vain, nor will it ever be. Lord, you are constantly remaking me, moulding me into something new, allowing my past to catch up with whom I am now and also who I was made to be.

 “Be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect”-Matthew 5:48

I used to see this was an impossiblity, something that Jesus just dangles out there so that I can never attain it. But what it means to me TODAY, is that when I find that Jesus is fully alive in me and I am in turn fully alive when I live into his promises and with unity in HIM then I can be perfect as He is, for he is and continues to be perfect in me. I know this sounds like some awkward sophmoric humor, but when lived in and fully realized that his creation is perfected in my heart and faith, then I am fully alive and fully perfected in his Love and mercy.

Lord Jesus, I thank you for my missionary calling and time in Mexico. Continue to bring to perfection your Love in my life, my faith and in my heart. I struggle daily to strive to live up to your promises, but that does not and hopefully never will stop me from trying to attain that which you promise, eternal salvation and union with you Lord. Amen.